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How you manage the beginning shapes the entire divorce
Most divorces are not decided mutually but are initiated by one of the partners who has reached the conclusion that the marriage cannot continue. This “initiator” has thought about the divorce for a...
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You can achieve a “good” divorce
Because divorce is generally regarded as regrettable and socially undesirable, we tend to think of all divorce as bad and destructive. Certainly, most of us have known people who have had bad divorces....
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The Do-It-Yourself Divorce
I have long been convinced that with a few scalpels and clamps I could remove my own appendix in a pinch. But that conviction does not mean that it would be a good idea to attempt nor does it mean …...
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Good divorce vs. Bad divorce
To understand the differences between good divorce and bad divorce requires a distinction between the two things: the fact of the divorce and the way of the divorce. The first refers to the losses that...
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Telling Your Spouse You Want a Divorce
Excerpted from Sam’s latest book, Negotiating the Good Divorce Sam’s latest book is available for download FREE. What is the best way to tell your spouse you want a divorce? It will be helpful to you...
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The Six Signs of Impending Divorce
The next time you are in a restaurant look for the sad couple eating dinner in silence. They make little or no eye contact and have little or no conversation. They are completely disengaged and are...
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Divorce and the American Legal System: a Poor Fit
It is in the field of divorce that the image of lawyers finds its most odious expression and where legal training is most disabling and counterproductive. Divorce lawyers have a terrible reputation...
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New Proposed Divorce Law in North Carolina Shows Ignorance about Divorce
North Carolina State Senators Austin Allran (R) of Hickory and Warren Daniel (R) of Morganton have recently introduced a new bill titled the “Healthy Marriage Act” into the NC legislature that appears...
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An Open Letter to Therapists of Divorcing Couples
After more than thirty years as a divorce lawyer and mediator, I have worked with over four thousand couples. I have a good sense of how the system works, and a multitude of additional resources for...
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Can We Afford to Divorce?
During hard economic times many unhappy couples who would otherwise seek a divorce remain unhappily married because one or both believe that they simply cannot afford to get a divorce. Typically, these...
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Dating After Divorce
What happens when you start dating after your divorce? A frequent issue in both divorce negotiations and post divorce conflicts is when, and under what conditions, children can be introduced to a new...
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A cautionary tale: Beware divorce lawyers and bad advice
Whether or not this story specifically resembles your divorce, the lessons within touch on the significance of how bad advice and divorce attorneys’ expensive maneuvering can leave you in dire...
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The Successful Marriage and Finding Balance: Pay Attention
Most couples get so busy with the details of their lives that they forgot why they got together in the first place. The “we” gets lost. Who has time for courting or fooling around or taking a walk or...
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Mediating Disputes with Unmarried Couples
Divorce mediation has evolved as a way to help married couples who wish to divorce to negotiate satisfactory settlements in lieu of struggling with litigation. And because marriage is an institution in...
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Divorce For Grown-Ups: How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce
The way you start your divorce sets the stage for everything that follows, and a bad start has the potential to derail what could otherwise be a good divorce. Tagged: Child support, Communication,...
View ArticleLitigation, mediation and the psychology of divorce
The adversary legal system has frequently been criticized by the mental health professions as poorly designed to meet the psychological needs of families. This article explores why that criticism is...
View ArticleHow you manage the beginning shapes the entire divorce
Most divorces are not decided mutually but are initiated by one of the partners who has reached the conclusion that the marriage cannot continue. This “initiator” has thought about the divorce for a...
View ArticleYou can achieve a “good” divorce
Because divorce is generally regarded as regrettable and socially undesirable, we tend to think of all divorce as bad and destructive. Certainly, most of us have known people who have had bad divorces....
View ArticleThe Do-It-Yourself Divorce
I have long been convinced that with a few scalpels and clamps I could remove my own appendix in a pinch. But that conviction does not mean that it would be a good idea to attempt nor does it mean I...
View ArticleGood divorce vs. Bad divorce
To understand the differences between good divorce and bad divorce requires a distinction between the two things: the fact of the divorce and the way of the divorce. The first refers to the losses that...
View Article